hey yes im tired but let’s put that on pause because i was just studying when i thought that if you turned someone into an ant, and then stepped on them, but then they bleed as much as they person they used to be and not the ant they turned into, wouldn’t that be hilarious
hey quick question, is the blood pressurized inside the person’s tiny ant body? does the accidental murderer get thrown fifty feet by a sudden jet of blood?
YES
like u step on an ant and suddenly WWOOOOSSSHHHH huge amounts of blood hit you so hard you fly back. ur leg, of course, is broken.
im laughing hysterically
blood is everywhere, you’re in incredible pain, u probably have a concussion and a new belief in immediate karmatic retribution
and it’s all gushing out of a tiny, tiny ant
like wouldn’t it be fucking amazing???
im crying this is the best thing ive thought about all day
“and how did these injuries occur?”
“i told you, doctor, it was the ant. i stepped on it and it fucking exploded. like a bloody confetti bomb. of actual blood.”
“Sure, Steven. Now, let’s have you checked in until next Sunday, hmm?”
“For my leg?”
“For your head.”
Basically, don’t step on ants because the fact that this has never happened before isn’t absolute proof that it will never happen. #illuminati
marlowfication 