some stuff isn’t just a trope, you know? in the movies, we’re introduced to women who are “experts” who have trained for years, who live and breathe and are willing to die for whatever the male main character has never even experienced before. and then he takes the reigns and upstages her, instantly, with a little bit of friendly bewilderment because, come on, it’s not antifeminist, he’s just good, he’s standing there having shown he’s actually more powerful than she’ll ever be – and we buy it. and then we go home and when we live and breathe something we still ask ourselves. “am i actually good at this? or is some fool going to walk into this presentation eighteen minutes in and offer a sarcastic and biting correction?” we wait for the man to show up and prove that, despite awards and training and an excellent job position, we’re actually just secretly incompetent.
the trope isn’t just setting up for us “this man is good at what he does” – the fact that the trope demands our male hero upstage the woman says: even an incompetent man will always be better than the best woman. he could have upstaged the sage boss or whatever other male in power exists in the movie. but he doesn’t. he upstages the woman to earn his pack order because she is, intrinsically, the weakest link. the real fight will be man against man. it always is.
and i wish, i wish it stopped outside of the theater. but the number of men who try (gently) to assure me that they’re actually better at what i have multiple degrees and years of experience in – it tells me it worked. men are always looking to be the hero, to interrupt, to upstage, to flip the woman on her back and expose her to all your fellow men – see! for someone who has been doing this forever, she’s just another woman. i am reminded by a man this is called mansplaining. i said “it’s a system of silencing women” and he said, “no, it’s just an accident.” in the movie, he sees himself pointing to my equation on the board, having just walked in. “here’s the flaw,” he says. in the real life, i’m too frustrated to speak. in the movie, he’s inevitably right.
elle woods flipping her hair and saying what, like it’s hard? was a funny line. it’s funny because in every other movie, it’s said by a guy.
i rly hate it when serial killer documentaries be like WHAT DO THESE MEN HAVE IN COMMON? THEY WERE ALL EXCEPTIONAL! INTELLIGENT! SO WHY DID THEY KILL?!?!?!? Like hate to burst ur bubble steven but serial killers are not actually, by rule, smarter than everyone else??? Ted Bundy wasn’t smarter than the average dude??? Like don’t get me wrong evening classes at law school sound v impressive despite failing his entrance exams before, but it doesn’t make him EXCEPTIONALLY intelligent? So far as I know only like… Andrew Young and Ed Kemper and a handful of others were above average, but even so the percentage isn’t larger among serial killers than it is among the general population??
Like basically stop glorifying serial killers, ok? coz u know some dumb fuck will actually believe it, and start idolizing those fucks, thinking that getting away with murder is something a genius move. it aint.
lack of empathy aint a sign of intelligence, basically.
According to the police report, the girl’s mother brought the child to the apartment complex to do a woman’s hair.
The report said a man made an advance on another woman, got into an altercation, and opened fire into a car with the child and her mother inside.
“He can’t handle his rage. He can’t handle his anger,” parent Dineshia Smith said.
“You know that little girl is fighting for her life right now just because a young man doesn’t know how to take rejection,” Sledge said
Oh he handled his rage exactly how he wanted to. It was not out of control. It was very well controlled. He did not shoot a random child or himself, and because he didn’t want to. He controlled his rage and aimed it at the daughter of the woman he felt entitled to. It was not the rejection that hurt the girl. It was the man. The man decided the punishment for disobedience was the death (which was his intent if not yet the outcome) of the most loved person to this woman.
This is not a loss of control. This is exacting control.
And this is a perfect example of how all men benefit from women’s reinforced fear of being hurt, or having their loved ones hurt, if they say no. Now this attempted murder has entered our collective consciousness, and women will hesitate a little longer, cringe back their instinct to resist, and acquiesce when a man pressures her, because the punishment for saying no is having your daughter shot. This is how patriarchy functions as terrorism.
That’s why I always argue that domestic violence is not a crime of passion, by the strict legal definition. It’s not about rage or strong emotion, It’s about deliberate actions with the intent of exacting control.
I didn’t know Mr. T pityed fool’s that weren’t woke, but that’s awesome. #respect
“I think about my father being called ‘boy’, my uncle being called ‘boy’, my brother, coming back from Vietnam and being called ‘boy’. So I questioned myself:“What does a black man have to do before he’s given the respect as a man?” So when I was 18 years old, when I was old enough to fight and die for my country, old enough to drink, old enough to vote, I said I was old enough to be called a man. I self-ordained myself Mr. T so the first word out of everybody’s mouth is “Mr.” That’s a sign of respect that my father didn’t get, that my brother didn’t get, that my mother didn’t get.“
“when a man does something well, we congratulate him. when a woman does something well, we drop her in thunderdome to battle other women for the title of Sole Woman Who Is Good At Things.”
I do!! But I’ve been told my tastes in books are boring af so uh I apologize in advance???
The Belgariad series by David Eddings (I read this series the first time when I was in 7th grade and it’s been one of my favs ever since.) Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End by Atul Gawande (I read this book recently and I think it should be compulsory reading, because it’s got some hard truths in it.) The Dark is Rising series by Susan Cooper (ultimate fave, will stanton’s kindness and maturity got lil me setting impossible standards for dudes) The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida (an eye-opening book that got me crying in many places) Murphy’s Boy by Torey Hayden (jfc. i just. my heart hurts but it’s such a good book, and children must be protected.) Uncle Montague’s Tales of Terror by Chris Priestley (i loooove this little horror book. maybe meant for kids, but idk who’d want to traumatize their kids with some of the stories here. Best horror fairytales in my opinion.)
Then, last but not least: the John Cleaver series by Dan Wells, which I binged through in like 3 days (the only series that imo portray a sociopath/psychopath correctly, while still keeping him as the main character).
I hope smth in this list sounds interesting to you too!
marlowfication 